Dingers

The bedtime routine is never an easy time in a household with young children. Nighttime is particularly chaotic in our already frenzied household and tonight was no exception.  There is a small bathroom located in our oddly shaped and impractical kitchen, so we always know what is going on in the loo regardless if the patron wants his/her business known or not. Since my daughters either have a verbalized monologue when alone or detailed conversation when together in the bathroom, we always know what deed is being done while retreating to the W.C. While I am frantically trying to clean up after dinner and get the girls upstairs for their baths, one of my daughters begins to scream “Poop on the floor! Poop on the floor!” So I drop the sponge into the kitchen sink and march into the bathroom and sure enough, there is a certifiable dinger on the floor. A dinger, if you are unaware of its delineation, is a dingleberry; a piece of poo that either hangs onto one’s buttocks for its dear life or falls off the cheeks and lands somewhere. Sometimes a dinger may land in your underpants, which then it is classified as a Hersey squirt. Tonight’s little dingleberry didn’t do much dingling or dangling, but instead promptly dropped to the floor. After commenting how gross that there was a dinger on the floor, I vacated the area because of the stench. How could something so small be so smelly? This may be a question that I never figure out the answer to for my entire reign as the Poopie Queen.